14 Things That Make Me Hate A Man's Internet Dating Profile

Bad spelling.
Not starting sentences with capital letters. Or not ending them with full stops.
Calling me 'babe'. Or worse, 'bbz'.
Blatantly sending the same copied and pasted message to hundreds of women.
Sending me tankards of ale, but no actual words. Actually, this did make me laugh, mostly because I'm pretty sure that the bloke in question would not want to have to deal with me after I've been drinking lager...
Living 100 miles away from me. I live in London, I don't need to travel far to find a date.
Proclaiming that you, 'love an Essex bird'.
Saying that you, 'just want a nice, sane woman' (I'm halfway there...).
Having a username along the lines of, 'sexiboi2013'.
Pre-warning women about your massive dong (yes, I have actually seen this on a profile...)
Photos with shirt off.
A profile picture of you posing with your scary-looking dog and waving a £50 note (yes, I have actually seen this on a profile...)

Me? Fussy?

To be fair, all of the stuff above is 95% of the fun of internet dating. The actual dates scare me. 


  1. AMEN to this!

    Though I'm totally besotted with a boy I met on internet dating, and he is apparently besotted with me so yeah, haa. I was terrified of the date but it's work out wonderfully so far :) xx

  2. Couldn't agree more! I've had pretty much every example here and then some.
    The messages that really tick me off just say "hi"...what am I supposed to work with?!
    Good luck with it all (I've more or less given up)

  3. Don't give up! It is tough as old boots, but it can work out.

  4. haha this made me giggle! Not sure I could cope with all this internet dating business! x

  5. All so true! My profile even said that I was an English teacher and obsessed with grammar - but most guys just did not get the hint.

  6. This is brilliant!

    I have tried online dating in the past but I have no idea where all the decent men are. Most of the men I've found don't surprise me that they're single. :P


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